every once in a while i wish i remembered how to speak. every once in a while i wish i knew how to cry. every once in a while i wish i was efficient. every once in a while, i wish my skin was thicker. every once in a while i wish i didn't want so much control. every once in a while i wish i didn't care what other people think. every once in a while i wish i was LOUD, UNCOMPROMISING. every once in a while i wish there wasn't anything left to fight. every once in a while i want mauritius.

every once in a while, i wish i could leap from the nearest window just to see how the breeze whistled on my skin.

every once in a while i wish someone was listening.
every once in a while i wish i could grab people by the throat, yanking, tearing, screaming, weeping, and make them look me in the eyes

every once in a while i wish i was a machine